Sunday, 22 December 2013

Some Irregular Days of the Elf on the Shelf: Day Whatever - Move Over, Zippy

Listen, it's like this. A few short weeks after we brought a newborn into our home, our toddler suddenly decided to cut her 12-14 hours of sleep down to about 3. We're talking getting up at 2am. For the day. So basically, my eyes are shriveling in my head, my brain is turning to liquid, and my blood-coffee level is about 99.9%. 

Zippy can suck it. 

Bottom line is that if you just had a baby, and you already have a child who spends the vast majority of her day running and arguing with you, you probably have enough on your plate. And when she finally goes to sleep and your eyes are bleeding, the chances of you passing out with your infant in your arms and one of your boobs hanging out before moving that little shit are pretty high. Trust me. I know. 

So don't feel bad for yourselves, moms. You're not alone. Maybe the Elf just stayed in the same place for a few weeks to throw them off. Who knows? 

Either way, that hooker better get out of my coffee. Nobody messes with that shit. 

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