Sunday, 31 March 2013

Knocked Up - The Sequel

That's right, friends! I am a total sucker for punishment and am now the host to a new little tenant, and let me tell ya, he's been given his six months notice and then he is outta here. Also, considering the fact that I took a month off from trying for a baby, and then immediately got pregnant as soon as the goalie was pulled after that, my husband has now lovingly informed me that "you take all the fun out of trying to get pregnant when you just get pregnant all the time." Thanks, Love. 

At this point in my Easter day, I don't have the time or energy to grace you with the gruesome details of this particular pregnancy, but I thought I'd leave you with a little something special. This newest baby has really touched my soul and I choose to express my feelings through poetry...

My boobs are sore
I can not poo 
Can barely bend  
To zip my boots  

I want a nap
I want to cry 
The thought of sex 
Makes me want to die 

My head is pounding 
My ankles, huge 
I'm still not over 
My new big boobs 

My jeans are tight 
I have to pee 
Metamucil replaces 
My lychee martini 

I cry at commercials 
I have to fart 
My social life  
Is falling apart 

I'm craving wine 
I can't breathe through my nose 
I'm losing sight 
Of my swollen toes 

 But it's not new implants 
In my double D cups 
This Surprise Momma 
Is once again, knocked up

View image.jpeg in slide show
Hey mom, thought you wanted a Kit Kat bar, did ya? PSYCH! Have fun heaving.
(The parasite at about 7 weeks along... dirty bugger.)

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